"It is never worth a first-class person's time to express a majority opinion. By definition, there are plenty of others to do that."
-- G. H. Hardy
"The plural of 'anecdote' is not 'data'."
-- Donald M. Berwick
"The difference between theory and practice is even larger in practice than it is in theory."
-- Attributed to Steve Crocker
"The two most common things in the Universe are hydrogen and stupidity."
-- Harlan Ellison
"You know how dumb the average person is? Well, by definition, half of 'em are dumber than THAT."
-- J.R. "Bob" Dobbs
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits."
-- Unknown
"If I have learned anything at all, it's that I know nothing about women. They remain a mystery. But I've learned to stop trying to figure them out."
-- Charlie Sheen
"Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then."
-- Katharine Hepburn
"Newt Gingrich has gone Lord Acton one better; he's been corrupted by power he doesn't even have yet."
-- George Stephanopoulos
"Never believe anything until it has been officially denied."
-- Otto von Bismark
"All newspaper editorial writers ever do is come down from the hills after the battle is over and shoot the wounded."
-- Bruce Anderson, "Anderson Valley Advertiser", Nov. 15, 1989
"Don't be afraid that the world will end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia."
-- Charles Schultz
"The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us."
-- Bill Watterson, "Calvin and Hobbes"
If you want to be happy for an evening, drink some rice wine. If you want to be happy for a week, butcher a pig. If you want to be happy for a year, get married. If you want to be happy for a lifetime, become a gardener.
-- Chinese Proverb
Brahms was once reported to have left a party with the exit line, "If there is anyone here I have not offended, I apologize."
-- Unknown
"people who are either uninformed, misinformed or poorly informed."
-- Donald Rumsfeld